Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Conversation With My Father:

Him: "Did you have dinner already?"
Me: "Yeah."
"What did you have?"
Me: "There was some [soy] chicken in the freezer."
"Did you open it or was it already open?"
"It was already opened. I finished it off."
"YOU FINISHED IT OFF? I hope there was only one piece!"
(It was this stuff. A serving is about five or six pieces.)
"Well, what will I have for dinner? I would have chicken, but somebody ate it all."
<taking a tupperware container of something I had intended to bring to lunch at the dance intensive, which didn't end up happening because, y'know, no dance intensive>
"How many calories did you say were in here?"
"330."
"In the whole thing? I'm not going to eat the whole thing! God! This is huge!"
(Yeah, fuck you, it was meant for the middle of a 6-hour intensive. Even I know that I'm allowed to eat under those circumstances.)
"Okay."
"What is this? Brown rice?"
"Mhmm."
"Where did you get brown rice?"
"...in the cabinet."
"You cooked it?"
"...yes."
"I didn't know you could cook brown rice in the microwave!"
"You can, but I didn't."
"Wow, I didn't know you could use a stove!"

Fuck. You. You. Fucking. Asshole.
I cook all the fucking time, and that was especially true before the ED bullshit. I cook WELL. DO NOT call into question my cooking skills.
He also likes to pretend that he eats healthier foods than I do, that everything I eat is crap, and that he's a better person for it. He likes to pretend that he's in great shape because he mountain bikes a few times a week (which, admittedly, is pretty good for a 61-year-old) and that I'm in awful shape, never exercise, and am incredibly unhealthy.
Dude. Even when I binge it's on protein-rich, vegetable-filled, whole grain kind of stuff. When I'm at school I dance 20ish hours a week and workout at least three times a week on top of that. I LIKE vegetables. He won't eat broccoli, beets, cauliflower, spinach, green beans, sweet potato, or avocado. He won't eat any kind of berries unless it's in the form of a strawberry milkshake. Dude's like five pounds away from being obese.
TELL ME AGAIN HOW YOU EAT HEALTHIER FOODS THAN I DO.
TELL. ME. AGAIN.

Fuck.
You.
You.
Fucking.
Asshole.

(Also, was not lying. I ate dinner. I actually binged. On soy chicken, on a soy riblet, on brown rice and beans with vegetables. On a few tortilla chips, but literally just ate 1300 calories and 87 grams of protein. So. Y'know. It could have been a lot worse, and this protein (99 grams total today) should keep me going for a while.At 1700 calories today. Fasting starts now, going until I see 133. Will NOT be in this house more than I absolutely have to.)

Aaaaand /endrant.

Sorry, y'all.
Hope your days are skinny and lovely and filled with less annoying people than mine. <3

3 comments:

  1. my Father would never have gone YOU F INISHD IT OFF to me
    he likes it when I eat the confusing fucker
    fuck that actually looks good miss vegan
    fucking asshole. what the flying fuck
    YOU SHOULD'VE DUMPED IT ON HIM AND PUT A HAIR DRYER TO HIS FACE UNTIL HIS FEATURES MELTED OFF
    'unless it's in a form of a strawberry milkshake' omg that's me
    FIVE POUNDS AWAY FROM BEING OBESE
    YOU'RE FUCKING JOKING
    AND HE QUESTIONS YOU
    WHAT AN ARSEHOLE
    THIS MAN IS MY MOTHER THATS WHAT HE IS
    and I do not like my Mother. period.
    assfspfgkspk punch him in the face still

    awwwwww
    I ate 0 grams of protein today. (okay more like 55. not bad.)

    -Sam Lupin

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  2. Ugh, after a day like that you are allowed to rant! What a fucking pig.
    SO UNCOOL

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  3. ugh that is the worst type of conversation ever. i get uneasy when people ask about my eating, but of course i try to be all cool and all. like yeah no big deal move on AND LEAVE ME ALONE. jesus. i'm sure you're healthier than pretty much the entire planet.
    PS: let's definitely get those goals. we CAN.

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